APOLOGY

It takes a strong person to stand up and apologise. I admire that.

When you’re not in the wrong and no apology is forthcoming it’s so hurtful, isolating. The feeling is dejection and loneliness.

I like a person who can apologise, it says a lot. It’s a loving soul that would rather admit they were wrong than have the last say or hold the silence.

Holding silence is controlling, it’s abusive. There’s nothing loving in that. I’ve been there, it’s painfully familiar. I lose my voice entirely, get lost in space.

Silence is loud. It’s uncomfortable and lonely. I don’t like the space. At all. Yet maybe that’s where the growth is, where you not only learn about the other, but about yourself.

SELF

Self is the only constant. Impossible to escape or reject, its the only constant companion. Be a person that you actually like and admire. To be imprisoned with someone that you neither like or respect would be a living (and sleeping) hell.

To reflect and question oneself leads to personal growth. Be the sort of person that evolves and most importantly be kind and treat both yourself and others well.

Having been on the receiving end of some crazy, unkind and vindictive behaviour for an extended period of time, it’s debilitating. What sense of self has the other person and how much must their system be poisoned? Still learning, I am improving my ability to deflect what is mainly subtle manipulative psychological abuse.

I come back to ‘self’, my core values, morals and the way that I want to live my life. I choose to visualise a glass cylinder around me which keeps me safe. I make the choice to disallow this negative energy to affect all the positive things in my life. And there are many.

I like my ‘self’. I get a little lost sometimes but I always find my way back as my inherent values and sense of who I am are strong.

ANCHORS

Anchor. Anchoring. Stability. A sense of being grounded. To be grounded is self-belief and a trust in personal values. Without values, you’re adrift, off course. Values provide centredness, holding you steady.

Values are an inner gauge to direct behaviours and attitudes. They’re intuitive and operate in the background. There are endless values, here are my top 5; authenticity, balance, compassion, contribution and kindness.

Authenticity is being genuine and real, true to yourself. Balance is leading a centred life, keeping all parts in harmony. Compassion is about being a good person, offering a loving heart and understanding another person at a soul level, without judgement or expectation. Contribution is giving back, understanding that you are part of a whole. Kindness is concern and consideration for others and their circumstances. If you can be anything, absolutely be kind.

These 5 values form my anchor, bringing me back to me intrinsically, sending signals when things are askew. The only one to be truly relied upon, is yourself. The only one that can be moulded and changed, is yourself. The only one who will always be a constant, is yourself. Me, my anchor.

Water allures me, it’s a gravitational pull that’s always touched my soul and left me happiest, it’s around water that I feel most ‘grounded’. There’s a special electrical energy present in the ground. When grounded, it leaves you centred, strong and balanced. I feel at my most grounded around water.

Grounded. Anchored. Held firm, not tight, slightly adrift. That’s me.