GRATITUDE

One big ugly life change that’s opened up my eyes and my world. For that, I feel so much gratitude.

Prior, I was blinkered, settling for less, existing. Struggling, hoping, muted. The world was grey, blurred. I was hollow and sad. Soul tired.

When a life change was upon me, I embraced it as best I could. I made choices, healthy ones, and set my sights on moving forward, very slowly at first. It was hard, very hard but I hung onto small glimpses of hope and light.

Those shining, fleeting moments carried me forward. When opportunities were presented, even big daunting ones, I quietly said yes. Those yes moments have brought me to today, and I could not be more proud of how far I have come.

The new me has traces of the old but the new Kara is confident and brave. The new me has healthy boundaries and an intuitive heart that knows instinctively who to let in, and who to lovingly leave out.

Today I notice the small things, and appreciate them for what they are. I don’t miss the signs when they’re there, and there have been many. Signs that tell me I’m on the right path. People that have come into my life at the right time, special people, significant. Opportunities that have presented, both little and massive.

Gratitude, I am grateful that I have been through both the worst and the best year of my life.

DREAMS

Passions and dreams. Daydream images. At least they were. Now they’re real. Why now? I’ve decided. My dreams have been there forever, I know them well, I always have, but have never given them life. Those intangible dreams will be no longer.

My time’s now, I sense that deeply. As I try to determine what it is about now that means it’s right, it’s clear that it’s because my life has been turned on its head. Colours have altered, shapes have morphed, unrecognisable, and that’s a good thing. There’s more fluidity, I’m embracing both the dramatic change and the subtle shifts. Change is not going to ‘happen’ to me, I am going to respond and adjust to what intuitive directions I‘d like to go.

With strong intuition accompanying me through life, I’ve allowed instinct to dim, chosen to neglect it, turning away and taking small glances back. Its difficult to ignore, volume increases, until it’s deafening. That was my experience anyway. Living towards your dreams is listening, hearing that deep part of your soul that speaks so calmly but surely. It knows the way.

Glancing back, there were vivid signs, which I questioned and cast off as coincidence. In hindsight they were huge rainbow flags that I had lost my way, and the signs showed me clearly why.

I’m stronger, happier and more confident than I have been for a very long time, creating the perfect opportunity to pursue my dreams with the imagination I had as a little girl, when everything felt possible. My dreams are centred around my craving to create, a whole collection of genres, and I want to explore all of them without limitation.

Alongside creativity is exploration. Travel. My dreams include extensive journeying to far flung places to fuel imagination, to broaden the story. Purpose. There has to be purpose. Contribution. What can I add while away and what can that translate to once home?

So there it is, pretty simple, creating, travelling, contributing. My dreams x